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ECRB- Dr Seuss VS Shakespeare by FrostRaven32 ECRB- Dr Seuss VS Shakespeare by FrostRaven32
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!
DR. SEUSS!
VERSUS
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE!
BEGIN!

William Shakespeare:

Come bite my thumb! I hope you know the stakes.

I'll put a slug between your shoulder blades,

Then ask what light through yonder poser breaks?

I hath been iambic on that ass, ye bastard. My rhymes are classic.

Your crap is drafted by a kindergartner high on acid.

Ye hoebag, you're an old white Soulja Boy who has no swag,

And no gonads. Egads, it's so sad.

And to top it off, you're not a doctor.

I've never seen a softer author.

You crook, you. I bet you wrote the Twilight books, too!

[Dr. Seuss pulls out a paintbrush and begins painting the Cat in the Hat.]

Cat in the Hat:

I would not, could not on a boat

Read any of the boring ass plays you wrote.

Even Horton doesn't want to hear you.

And Cindy Lou Who is afraid to go near you!

You bore people to death.

You leave a classroom looking like the end of MacBeth.

I entertain a child of any age.

You gotta translate what you said on the opposite page!

How you gonna battle with the Cat in the Hat?

Little kids get scared when I step on the mat.

You think your ruffled neck ass gonna rap to that?

I got a best selling book about me coming back.

[Dr. Seuss closes the book as Shakespeare holds up a skull.]

William Shakespeare:

I'm switching up my style like the Beatles with my pieces.

Each is such a wonder with a plethora of features.

You're pathetically predictable.

You think your new book might include a trisyllabic meter

And some ghetto Muppet creatures.

The Bard is in the building.

It's a castle, I'm a boss.

I bet I'm Parliament.

I'm positive I'm killing it.

I'm iller than the plague.

I've never caught or cholera,

A baller baller

On some cricket bowler business,

While you're sitting in the bleachers!

[Seuss and the Cat look at each other, mouths open amazed by Shakespeare's fast rapping.]

Cat in the Hat:

You rap fast, you do. Yes, you rap fast, it's true.

Now let's see how you rap versus Things One and Two!

Thing 1 and 2:

Oh, no, we'll smash your globe!

Yo, you may have wrote the script, but now we running the show!

You can take your fancy words and send 'em back home to your mama!

Break our foot off in your ass with our feetie pajamas!

Man, we'll cook you up and eat you with some ham and green eggs!

We'll break offa your legs! Make no mistake, we in a rage!

All does not end well when we bust out our cage!

You getting upstaged Bill- Yo, you just got played!

WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC RAP....... BATTLES
OF HISTORY!

This Was based off of the ECRB Pics that my friend :iconwitchcooper: had done already. In this case, its Epic Cosplay Rap Battles of History. I had Raven be Seuss and Alex be Shakespeare since we have mixed opinions on who won. Enjoy.

Credits to everything shown

Add a Comment:
 
:iconultratony:
ultratony Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2014  Student Digital Artist
classic
Reply
:iconfrostraven32:
FrostRaven32 Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Eeyup
Reply
:iconlsj7812:
lsj7812 Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Reply
:iconfrostraven32:
FrostRaven32 Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
Lol xD
Reply
:iconevolking96:
EvolKing96 Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist

"I entertain a child of any age.

You gotta translate what you said on the opposite page!"


Gotta love those Epic Battles

Reply
:iconfrostraven32:
FrostRaven32 Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
Yup. Making me want to do the holiday one on Donald trump vs scrooge.
Reply
:iconevolking96:
EvolKing96 Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
It's great for the holiday, though.
Reply
:iconfrostraven32:
FrostRaven32 Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
Yup
Reply
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December 24, 2013
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